Wednesday, April 1, 2015

Fox for Nashville Campaign Floats Transit Plan. WHAT????

 Network leverages sustainable fuels and “out-of-the-box” modes

For immediate release: April 1, 2015. Nashville, Tenn.--
Mayoral candidate David Fox today unveiled a three-point plan to keep Nashville moving forward, by providing innovative transportation options that are more fuel-efficient and more “fun” than standard automotive vehicles.

The cutting-edge intermodal plan will layer air, land and water routes, while adding no traffic to existing roadways, and will be phased in over three years, starting in fall 2015.

Phase 1: An east-west dirigible, also known as a blimp, will connect the air corridor between Bellevue and East Nashville. Depending on wind currents, this retro-chic and Wi-Fi enabled zeppelin, nicknamed The Blamp, will either reduce the 13-mile journey between Sam’s Club and Marché Artisan Foods by 5 minutes or increase it by 2 hours.

Phase 2: Following the model of telecommunication companies piggybacking on existing trunklines, the subterranean channels currently employed by Metro’s stormwater and sewer systems will host a human flume, open 24 hours a day, with all routes terminating at the Cumberland River.

Phase 3: In an effort to promote a pedestrian lifestyle in the downtown core, a network of pack animals for short-term rental will help walkers transport cargo that might otherwise necessitate a vehicle.

“This transit trifecta will be the envy of cities across the world and will fortify Nashville’s reputation as a creative center,” Fox said. “Imagine living in a city where you can take a water slide to work, rent a llama to get to your meetings, then take the Blamp home. It will be like living in Opryland.”

The program is expected to cost somewhere between $20,000 and $2 billion, depending on the number of llamas and size of the Blamp fleet. Passenger rates will be in line with existing public transportation. “This is gonna be awesome,” Fox said. “You’re gonna wanna spring for the season pass.”
The above is exactly the way I received it. And it had the official Fox logo in the email. I must assume this is someone's joke and the email is a fake. This is pretty funny. It got a laugh out of me. I have contacted the Fox campaign for a comment. Rod 

I just realized today is April Fools day. Rod

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