Sunday, January 24, 2010

Dear Global Warming Scientist, I am not as smart as a global warming scientist but I think I am as smart as a fifth grader.

According to a recent news report, “Five glaring errors were discovered in one paragraph of the world's most authoritative report on global warming forcing the Nobel Prize-winning panel of climate scientists who wrote it to apologize and promise to be more careful.”

The glaring errors were in the 2007 report by the Intergovernmental Panel on Climate Change. The IPCC is the UN affiliated body that is considered the ultimate authority on climate change. It is their report that persuades the nations of the world global warming is real, that is man made and will have terrible consequences if it is not addressed.

Here is one of those glaring errors in the IPCC report. The report says that between 1845 and 1965, the Himalayan Pindari Glacier shrank by 2,840 meters. It says that's a rate of 135.2 meters a year. Now here is the part where I think I am as smart as a fifth grader. I know that that is not correct.

I would assume global warming scientists have very smart computers and they could get this math question right. However you don’t have to have really sophisticated scientific program on your computer to do this math. I have a build-in calculator on my desk top. At work, at any one time, I have three or four cheap calculators lying around. Without a calculator however, I can still work this problem. I really do want to do my little part to help the advancement of science, so here is my letter to the scientist at IPCC.

Dear Global warming scientist,

I really want us to get this global warming science stuff right. It could have terrible consequences if we get it wrong. You see, I am not a global warming scientist so I have been depending on you. I have been trusting the experts. I was led to believe the smartest people in the world were working on this global warming science. Also, you had Al Gore helping you. I was trusting you.

I am disappointed in your sloppy work. Also that climategate thing with the fraud and silencing of dissenting voices and the destruction of data and manipulation of data concerned me. Nevertheless, I still have a hard time believing that the whole scientific world is in on a super big conspiracy. Anyway, I am going to try to help you with your most recent problem of the glaring mistakes in the IPCC report. To do that, I am going to try to put this math problem in the form of a written fifth grade math question and I am going to walk you through it.

Math question. If between the year 1965 and 1846 a glacier shrinks 2,840 meters, how many meters a year did it shrink?

Step one: Subtract 1845 from 1966. This is the really, really tricky part. Both 1965 and 1846 are between the start of the year 1846 and the end of the year 1965. This is why you have to read the question very, very carefully and you have to think about the question. I could draw a time line if it would help you. The answer is 121.

Step two: Divide 2,840 by 121. I know borrowing numbers is hard. And, wow, decimals are really, really difficult. The answer is 23.47. If you round it to one decimal point it is 23.5. (I will explain rounding another time.)

See, the real answer is 23.5 meters a year; not 135.2. I don’t know how you got that answer. If you had only missed it a little I could understand. I sometime get confused on step one myself. So if you had got that wrong by one year your answer might have been off a little. I could understand. I don’t known how in the world you got 135.2, however. Where did that number come from?

Ok, that is all of the time I have tonight. I will address the other glaring errors at a later time. In the meantime please, please double check your math. Maybe Al Gore has a calculator? You are about to cause me to lose my global warming religion.

Rod Williams

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  1. I suspected the whole global warming scam right away. It tied in much too nicely with the left's agenda to be true.

  2. The IPCC is a hack political body posing as a serious scientific entity.

  3. Thanks for this info its really LOL.